Sarah Selina Dolloway, known throughout her life as 'Lena,' is my paternal great grandmother and a woman of remarkable courage, fortitude, and determination. For the benefit of her descendants, and anyone else in need of inspiration, I will briefly describe her life, including a difficult childhood, adventures in America, and ample measure of loss, love, and laughter.
Challenging Childhood
Lena was born on May 19, 1892 in London, England.1 She had many interesting stories about being a child in that place and time but one will suffice for now. In that era, it was common for adults to "drink beer with their meals," and the children were usually the ones sent to go get the beer for their parents.2 As such, Lena said that often "there would be a line-up of children waiting to get their buckets full of beer."3 Both her parents died by the time Lena was 10 years old, leaving her in the custody of her stepfather and new stepmother. As a result, she moved around to several different homes including those of her Uncle Jack, Uncle Fred, and even a neighbor lady with whom she got along well.4 In short, her early years were tumultuous and far from an ideal family setting.
Adventures in America
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"Mother," FamilySearch,
https://www.familysearch.org/photos/artifacts/122442943?cid=mem_copy.
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Given her difficult upbringing, it should serve as little surprise that, when she had an opportunity to travel to the United States and live with her uncle for a year (or so she thought), she capitalized on it. So it was that at the tender age of 22, this young girl who "had never been further" than the London metropolis, boarded the SS St. Louis and traveled across the Atlantic Ocean.5 Upon arriving at Ellis Island, she was surprised to discover that not only was her uncle not there to pick her up, but that she still had to cross nearly the entire United States by train to get to Salt Lake City, and then by wagon to arrive in Ely, Nevada.6 To make a long story short, she persevered and ultimately arrived safe and sound in mid-1914. The following year, she met and fell in love with an American named Reuben Hugh Bates and they were married on September 12, 1915.7
Loss, Love, and Laughter |
"Ms. Pryor (OK) Nursing Home," FamilySearch,
https://www.familysearch.org/photos/artifacts/122442943?cid=mem_copy.
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Lena and Reuben would live happily together for many years. Reuben always knew how to push his wife's buttons and would occasionally "tease her about her cooking or remind her that the Yankees whipped the 'Johnny Bulls' in the [American] Revolutionary War."8
Together, they raised their eight children, weathered the storms of the Great Depression (including food scarcity, job loss, and relocating their family), World War II (in which three of their sons and one of their sons-in-law were in the military), and overcame medical challenges, such as Lena's goiter surgery.9 Ultimately, though, Reuben passed away in 1958, leaving Lena to live the remainder of her days, an additional 33 years, as a widow surrounded by her loved ones.10 Though she came from a less than ideal family background, with her husband and children, she managed to create a loving family of her own that was worthy of emulation.
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"Love my 'little Mama,'" FamilySearch,
https://www.familysearch.org/photos/artifacts/122463805?cid=mem_copy.
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Stubbornly Successful Despite Adversity
According to her grandchildren, Grandmother was simply not ticklish because "she refused to be."11 As she tickled them, she would say, it was "all about mind over matter."12 While that is a silly and simple example, it serves as a microcosm of her determination to not let life or circumstances dictate her response or her happiness. She lived through the loss of both parents in her childhood, immigrated to the United States alone, experienced the Great Depression, suffered the loss of her sweetheart Reuben, and many other hardships, and yet she retained her sense of humor, love of country, and work ethic. May it be so well spoken of us.
Footnotes:
1 Jefferson Thomas Bates, "Sarah Selina Dolloway," in Ancestry of Reece A. Bates, Personal Library of Justin Bates.
2 Ibid.
3 Ibid.
4 Ibid.
5 Ibid.
6 Ibid.
7 ———, "Reuben Hugh Bates," in Ancestry of Reece A. Bates, Personal Library of Justin Bates.
8 Ibid.
9 Bates, "Sarah Selina Dolloway."
10 Ibid.
11 "A Memory from the Reece Bates Children," in Ancestry of Reece A. Bates, Personal Library of Justin Bates.
12 Ibid.
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